CONGRATS AMERICA YOU’VE BEEN HAD! | WH, DOJ STONEWALL HOUSE INTEL | BUT HIS EMAILS: PRINCELING JARED’S PRIVATE ACCOUNT | KREMLIN COLLEAGUE PAYS PART OF TRUMP LEGAL DEFENSE | OBAMA TRIED TO WAKE ZUCK WHO HIT SNOOZE | MUSLIM BAN 2.0 | WHAT MAKES MELANIA IMPRESSIVE

-----BREAKING-----   CONGRATS AMERICA YOU’VE BEEN HAD! YOUR PRESIDENT IS A RUSSIAN FAKE Radio Free Europe/Radio Liberty reports, “The U.S. government on September 22 notified 21 states that their voting systems were targeted by hackers in last year's presidential election, and several of the most closely contested states said the hackers were linked to the … Continue reading CONGRATS AMERICA YOU’VE BEEN HAD! | WH, DOJ STONEWALL HOUSE INTEL | BUT HIS EMAILS: PRINCELING JARED’S PRIVATE ACCOUNT | KREMLIN COLLEAGUE PAYS PART OF TRUMP LEGAL DEFENSE | OBAMA TRIED TO WAKE ZUCK WHO HIT SNOOZE | MUSLIM BAN 2.0 | WHAT MAKES MELANIA IMPRESSIVE

NORTH KOREA SANCTIONS | FAKEBOOK SHARES ADS WITH CONGRESS | ZUCK IS WOKE IN A SHIT BROWN T-SHIRT | SKADDEN, ARPS HIT BY MANAFORT SHITSTORM | TRUMP-RELEVANT OLIGARCHS CALLED INTO THE KREMLIN | RUSSIA TESTFIRES ICBM | RUSSIA + ITS BANKS ARE FUCKED

-----BREAKING-----   DOES TRUMP KNOW NORTH KOREA SANCTIONS HURT HIS RUSSIAN FRIENDS? POLITICO reports, “President Donald Trump on Thursday announced a new executive order that he said would expand authorities to go after individuals, companies and banks involved in trade with North Korea, amid heightened tensions as that country continues ramping up its missile testing.” … Continue reading NORTH KOREA SANCTIONS | FAKEBOOK SHARES ADS WITH CONGRESS | ZUCK IS WOKE IN A SHIT BROWN T-SHIRT | SKADDEN, ARPS HIT BY MANAFORT SHITSTORM | TRUMP-RELEVANT OLIGARCHS CALLED INTO THE KREMLIN | RUSSIA TESTFIRES ICBM | RUSSIA + ITS BANKS ARE FUCKED

MUELLER WANTS ALL THE WHITE HOUSE DOCS | “PRIVATE BRIEFINGS” IN POLITICS IS NOW WAY DIRTIER THAN SEX | RUSSIA + MANAFORT FOR IRAQI KURDISTAN | A MOBSTER WITHOUT AN ENFORCER IS LIKE A SALAD WITHOUT DRESSING | MELANIA TAKES HER OLD “AGENT” TO THE UN | FLORIDA FAKEBOOK

-----BREAKING-----   MUELLER WANTS DOCS ON COMEY FIRING/RUSSIANS IN OVAL OFFICE The New York Times reports, “Robert S. Mueller III, the special counsel, has asked the White House for documents about some of President Trump’s most scrutinized actions since taking office, including the firing of his national security adviser and F.B.I. director”. White House officials … Continue reading MUELLER WANTS ALL THE WHITE HOUSE DOCS | “PRIVATE BRIEFINGS” IN POLITICS IS NOW WAY DIRTIER THAN SEX | RUSSIA + MANAFORT FOR IRAQI KURDISTAN | A MOBSTER WITHOUT AN ENFORCER IS LIKE A SALAD WITHOUT DRESSING | MELANIA TAKES HER OLD “AGENT” TO THE UN | FLORIDA FAKEBOOK

WHAT DOCS HAS DON MCGAHN GOT LOCKED IN A SAFE? | HOW WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR MONEY LAUNDERED? | FACEBOOK GAVE MUELLER RUSSIAN PSYOPS RECORDS | TODAY IN FULL TRUMPISTAN HEADLINES | PRETTY WOMAN DREAMS: MELANIA

-----BREAKING-----   TRUMP’S RUSSIA LAWYER OVERHEARD SAYING SOMETHING DELICIOUS The New York Times reports Trump’s in-house Russia lawyer Ty Cobb and John Dowd, described as “a Washington lawyer with extensive experience in high-profile political cases,” while at lunch “at BLT Steak, not far from the White House and a few doors down from The Times’s … Continue reading WHAT DOCS HAS DON MCGAHN GOT LOCKED IN A SAFE? | HOW WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR MONEY LAUNDERED? | FACEBOOK GAVE MUELLER RUSSIAN PSYOPS RECORDS | TODAY IN FULL TRUMPISTAN HEADLINES | PRETTY WOMAN DREAMS: MELANIA

ZAPAD STARTS | RUSSIA DIDN’T GET ITS WAY WITH THE U.S. | WH MOVES TO ALLOW ANONYMOUS LEGAL FUND GIFTS | MUELLER LOOKING AT COMEY FIRING + SOCIAL MEDIA | FLYNN + JR LIES + CONSPIRACIES | US GOVERNMENT BANS KASPERSKY

-----ON THE AGENDA-----   ZAPAD WATCH: STARTING TODAY, RUSSIA PREPS TO LOSE TO VEYSHNORIA Watch out Russia, Veyshnoria is going to kick your ass but not if it doesn’t have to. Actually it already did. And the Russians are streaming across the border to freedom where the Veyshnorians are passing out bananas. Reuters reports, “From … Continue reading ZAPAD STARTS | RUSSIA DIDN’T GET ITS WAY WITH THE U.S. | WH MOVES TO ALLOW ANONYMOUS LEGAL FUND GIFTS | MUELLER LOOKING AT COMEY FIRING + SOCIAL MEDIA | FLYNN + JR LIES + CONSPIRACIES | US GOVERNMENT BANS KASPERSKY

TRUMP IGNORES LAWYERS | CHAIRMAN OF THE JOINT CHIEFS THINLY VEILED CRITICISM OF TRUMP | HILLARY BELIEVES TRUMP CAMP COLLUDED | FBI INVESTIGATES RUSSIAN STATE-RUN SPUTNIK | PUTIN GIVES KISLYAK A MEDAL FOR THE AMERICA OPERATION | DARKNESS AT NUNES LURKS

-----BREAKING-----   TRUMP’S LAWYERS WANTED PRINCELING JARED GONE The Wall Street Journal reports, “Some of President Donald Trump’s lawyers earlier this summer concluded that Jared Kushner should step down as senior White House adviser because of possible legal complications related to a probe of Russia’s involvement in the 2016 presidential election and aired concerns about … Continue reading TRUMP IGNORES LAWYERS | CHAIRMAN OF THE JOINT CHIEFS THINLY VEILED CRITICISM OF TRUMP | HILLARY BELIEVES TRUMP CAMP COLLUDED | FBI INVESTIGATES RUSSIAN STATE-RUN SPUTNIK | PUTIN GIVES KISLYAK A MEDAL FOR THE AMERICA OPERATION | DARKNESS AT NUNES LURKS

HAPPY SEPTEMBER 11 | EVERYONE IS A WITNESS | “HELP WORLD PEACE + MAKE A LOT OF MONEY” | WHO HAS EVEN LESS CREDIBILITY: RUSSIA OR THE WH? | FAKE NEWS FACEBOOK | EUROPEANS FINALLY FREAKING OUT RIGHT ON TIME FOR ZAPAD

-----ON THE AGENDA-----   HAPPY SEPTEMBER 11! ABC News notes Trump will preside over his first September 11 ceremony as president. Be still, beating heart! You can of course hear the audio of Trump boasting as the towers fell that now he has the tallest building in Manhattan, which still is not even remotely true. … Continue reading HAPPY SEPTEMBER 11 | EVERYONE IS A WITNESS | “HELP WORLD PEACE + MAKE A LOT OF MONEY” | WHO HAS EVEN LESS CREDIBILITY: RUSSIA OR THE WH? | FAKE NEWS FACEBOOK | EUROPEANS FINALLY FREAKING OUT RIGHT ON TIME FOR ZAPAD